The week before last I met with 9 teenagers and young adults.  I offered them the opportunity of a lifetime.  A full-time job for 47 weeks.  The experience of building a new house from scratch with green technology and renewable energy applications.  The ability to earn $2400 each for college.  The promise of assistance to find employment and/or college admission at the end of the 47 weeks.  And a variety of support and incentives along the way.

After the meeting, it was obvious they were excited about being a part of a project that was bigger than any one person.  Each had expressed the fact it was difficult for them to find employment and no job possibility had the perks this one did.  They were ready to go, they said.  They were told the interview process would be intense, in part, because the opportunity was great.  I scheduled an individual meeting with each for last Tuesday, June 2nd.

By June 2nd, one was in jail, one decided to work a cash job for the day thinking he could reschedule the interview at the last minute and one was angry, defiant and acting entitled and even after being asked to take a break and come back and try it again, he was unable to present himself appropriately.  The other six were barely prepared and will be offered a second interview with no guarantees.

For 27 years, I have heard all the arguments about being positive, talking to kids about success, building their self-confidence, doing the “you can do it” pumping.  But that is the easy work.  It’s clean and nice and uplifting.

None of this will be effective unless we are willing to address the power of failure and the reality of sabotage and self-defeating behavior which permeates many of this generation of kids.  Failure is not just the end result; it is the thinking process along the way.  We grossly underestimate its active presence.  By doing so, we fail our children.

Who is going to dare to crawl into the interconnected caves of their minds, whether invited or not, to see what lurks there and to do battle with the patterns of thought that foment the destruction of opportunity?  Who is going to wade into the cesspool of their unacceptable behavior and tell them in no uncertain terms, “not on my watch”?  Who has the guts to take on empty vessels that care for little, want for nothing, in order to demonstrate that there is a higher authority based upon principle and value and seniority?  If not parentwarriors, then who?